As I was lying in my bed yesterday, petting the cat's head, I felt suddenly overwhelmed with how much trust this furball decides to put into me. By allowing me to touch his face and belly, which are some of the more vunerable areas, my cat shows, that he trusts me and I consider this a great honor - no only because it did not always used to be like that; in the beginning he was rather shy.
Now this is the beautiful thing about animaly, you see? You can watch them build trust to you, because it happens a lot faster than with humans, an also, because they are not biased. I know many people who, after having had a bad experience, feel distrustrust that just won't let go. We are human, this is how we are; and it is neither wrong being a little careful because somebody fits the scheme of someone we have been disappointed by, nor is it wrong to try see those who did use our trust as individual little shitlords/-ladies that should not change the way how we see others in general.
Being someone who does not let bad past-experiences mingle with trust I put into someone who had nothing to do with all of that, it always gets to me, when I meet people where something bad left their mark on them.
When there is distrust, it means that there is the fear of something specific to happen or to repeat and the thought that some are so stigmatized, that the mere sight of somebody, who seems to fit a certain distrust profile (can be basic things like "a lawyer") starts to unleash this fear, makes me sad, for I know that this exact fear can be the one thing that really stands between two people or groups of people, not allowing for positive interactions to form. I always feel bad they had to go through something, that to them personaly was so bad, that they could never really get over it.
When you look at animals again; I have made the observation, that no matter what they have been through - if you show love and patience you can earn their trust.
One would argue, that the same applies to humans, but I don't think this is completely true. Sometimes, it is possible, definitely. But in some cases, the fear is so strong, that even positive experiences will not be able to remove the bias completely. When somebody for instance has made bad experiences with friends in the past, that they would at some point lose interest and shove our example-person aside, there is a good chance, that even when finding good friends, an anxiety will remain lingering, telling them that "one day, even those friends will abandon you."
Knowing that I have truly earned someone's trust, is one of the most beautiful things adnt his is why I felt so touched over my wee realization yesterday ^~^
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